Brian Williams Teleprompter Goes Blank During Dinner Party, Anchor Unresponsive For Two Hours

During a recent gathering at the Williams household, along with Jane Williams (spouse) and several close friends, Brian Williams, the anchor of NBC Nightly News since 2004, froze still in a coma-like trance. Guests reported the anchor to be unresponsive for over two hours. Paramedics were dispatched but efforts gave no help. It was not until NBC directors restored power to the dining room teleprompter and life giving dialogue was administered.

Mr Williams has become America’s most beloved talking-dick-head and after decades of broadcast journalism, Brian has lived life entirely through a tele-prompter since 2007. A former agent and long-time friend, Ari Silver stated, ‘Brian and I have grown closer these past years and our conversations have been more memorable and, well, I just love him.”

While many people disagree with the lifestyle choice Mr Williams has made, the trend is here to stay. Jeff Hockwell, an analyst with IBM, the world’s largest manufacturer of tele-prompters agrees with the numbers. “Our household version, the ‘bore-no-more’ has been a home run”, Jeff told the Douche Review in an exclusive interview.

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